Content 50 ml
Recommended treatment
Free shipping on orders of more than £ 30.00
VAT included
Many parents worry about the consequences for children after a divorce because they understand that such a situation involves a massive upheaval for all involved. Divorce is not necessarily the issue for children, it is more the uncertainty that follows.
For some children there is the devastation of the realisation that their parents just don’t love each other anymore, and suddenly they find themselves torn between two houses. Life changes significantly and this can create a challenge for the children and the adults who care for them.
Some consequences for children after a divorce will depend on the age of the child. On the one hand a younger child may adapt more quickly, however divorce can mean the child becomes more dependent and needs more reassurance. An older child may become more independent more quickly, and sometimes may have anger issues to one or both parents, and these can manifest themselves in a number of different behaviours. A young child may become more regressive and an older child more aggressive, although actually you may find the reverse to be true with your own child. It depends on the individual.
Theoretically you can understand why these behaviours occur. Young children are dependent on their parents, and their family is their world, so a young child may have their foundations badly shaken, and feel insecure and unsure about this new world. An older child is more reliant on their friends anyway, and has begun moving in the wider world, so divorce can accelerate their desire for independence and, in some cases, escape from the home situation.
In either case, the child will suddenly find themselves being transported between one parent and the other. The family unit has been split. It is now unfamiliar and unstable. The child can access one parent or the other, never both at the same time. An older child may adjust more quickly to this situation, but a young child may well desire that both come together again and take longer to accept what has happened.
Any child may well fear the future. The environment that was once so sacrosanct for them has disappeared and they may well find life more frightening than before and worry that other ‘bad’ things will happen to them. A young child may become clingier, start to wet the bed, cry, have tantrums or whine a lot. They may suddenly forget how to care for themselves – washing, grooming, brushing teeth etc. This behaviour is attention seeking, designed to reassure the child that s/he is still loved.
The older child, more independent, may become more rebellious – in terms of discipline, dress etc. They may become sexually active younger than expected, they may have self-esteem issues. They may become distant and defiant and self-interested, because at a deep level, they believe that they need to look after themselves now. In return the parent may offer them increased responsibility within the family and the accountability that goes with that.
For parents, the immediate aftermath of a divorce necessitates three things that will restore their offspring’s trust: Routines, Rituals, and Reassurance. The child needs to know what to expect, and feel loved. Adjustment can take a couple of years, and this time frame will be extended if they are blended into a new family.
It is not all doom and gloom however. Research in the USA has shown that some children feel relief when their parents separate, as the family situation is tough when there is a great deal of angst and acrimony. Waiting until the children are older is not necessarily a wise decision, because children know when there is little love lost between their parents, and many children are more than happy to see both parents thrive after a divorce. Seeing happiness after a divorce, no matter where it blooms, will gladden any heart, eventually.
Created by Tom Vermeersch (bio)
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
Do you expect too much from others? Find out!
Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?
Can you accept things you can't change? Take our quiz!
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Signs you're slipping into a burn-out
Learn how to recognise the signs of stress and avoid slipping into a burnout or a bore-out
How to stop everything going wrong
Do you always feel that everything’s always going wrong? Find out how to stop this cycle of bad thoughts in its tracks. When you think positively, things will start to appear positive and you will eventually feel more positive and optimistic.
It's often difficult to say no, but some people never do! So how do you know when to say no and when to say yes?
Tips to balance your negative aspects
Everyone is unique, even in their own bad habits or negative traits. Here are some tips to balance those negative traits in our new article!
How can I help my child achieve their dreams?
Children's imaginations know no limits and their dreams are a mix of hopes and fantasies, the real and the magical, the impossible and the achievable.
Being happy is something everybody strives for, but unfortunately there are a lot of people who go through life unhappily. A lot of people take life how it is.
7 tips to help your dog with a fear of fireworks
As nice as it is for a person to celebrate New Year, it's not so nice for a dog, especially when the loud fireworks go off the whole night. This is really frightening for many dogs. Read our 7 tips on how you can help your dog with his fear of fireworks.
Subtle signs your child is unhappy
According to figures from the World Health Organisation, more than 260 million people worldwide suffer from depression. And it's not only adults who are diagnosed with this illness. Children as young as three or four years old can experience depression.
Many parents worry about the consequences for children after a divorce because they understand that such a situation involves a massive upheaval for all involved. Divorce is not necessarily the issue for children, it is more the uncertainty that follows.
For some children there is the devastation of the realisation that their parents just don’t love each other anymore, and suddenly they find themselves torn between two houses. Life changes significantly and this can create a challenge for the children and the adults who care for them.
Some consequences for children after a divorce will depend on the age of the child. On the one hand a younger child may adapt more quickly, however divorce can mean the child becomes more dependent and needs more reassurance. An older child may become more independent more quickly, and sometimes may have anger issues to one or both parents, and these can manifest themselves in a number of different behaviours. A young child may become more regressive and an older child more aggressive, although actually you may find the reverse to be true with your own child. It depends on the individual.
Theoretically you can understand why these behaviours occur. Young children are dependent on their parents, and their family is their world, so a young child may have their foundations badly shaken, and feel insecure and unsure about this new world. An older child is more reliant on their friends anyway, and has begun moving in the wider world, so divorce can accelerate their desire for independence and, in some cases, escape from the home situation.
In either case, the child will suddenly find themselves being transported between one parent and the other. The family unit has been split. It is now unfamiliar and unstable. The child can access one parent or the other, never both at the same time. An older child may adjust more quickly to this situation, but a young child may well desire that both come together again and take longer to accept what has happened.
Any child may well fear the future. The environment that was once so sacrosanct for them has disappeared and they may well find life more frightening than before and worry that other ‘bad’ things will happen to them. A young child may become clingier, start to wet the bed, cry, have tantrums or whine a lot. They may suddenly forget how to care for themselves – washing, grooming, brushing teeth etc. This behaviour is attention seeking, designed to reassure the child that s/he is still loved.
The older child, more independent, may become more rebellious – in terms of discipline, dress etc. They may become sexually active younger than expected, they may have self-esteem issues. They may become distant and defiant and self-interested, because at a deep level, they believe that they need to look after themselves now. In return the parent may offer them increased responsibility within the family and the accountability that goes with that.
For parents, the immediate aftermath of a divorce necessitates three things that will restore their offspring’s trust: Routines, Rituals, and Reassurance. The child needs to know what to expect, and feel loved. Adjustment can take a couple of years, and this time frame will be extended if they are blended into a new family.
It is not all doom and gloom however. Research in the USA has shown that some children feel relief when their parents separate, as the family situation is tough when there is a great deal of angst and acrimony. Waiting until the children are older is not necessarily a wise decision, because children know when there is little love lost between their parents, and many children are more than happy to see both parents thrive after a divorce. Seeing happiness after a divorce, no matter where it blooms, will gladden any heart, eventually.
Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?
Read the complete article
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Read the complete article
Learn how to recognise the signs of stress and avoid slipping into a burnout or a bore-out
Do you always feel that everything’s always going wrong? Find out how to stop this cycle of bad thoughts in its tracks. When you think positively, things will start to appear positive and you will eventually feel more positive and optimistic.
It's often difficult to say no, but some people never do! So how do you know when to say no and when to say yes?
Everyone is unique, even in their own bad habits or negative traits. Here are some tips to balance those negative traits in our new article!
Children's imaginations know no limits and their dreams are a mix of hopes and fantasies, the real and the magical, the impossible and the achievable.
Being happy is something everybody strives for, but unfortunately there are a lot of people who go through life unhappily. A lot of people take life how it is.
Read the complete article
As nice as it is for a person to celebrate New Year, it's not so nice for a dog, especially when the loud fireworks go off the whole night. This is really frightening for many dogs. Read our 7 tips on how you can help your dog with his fear of fireworks.
According to figures from the World Health Organisation, more than 260 million people worldwide suffer from depression. And it's not only adults who are diagnosed with this illness. Children as young as three or four years old can experience depression.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
© 2025 Mariepure - Webdesign Publi4u
Are you unsure which Bach flowers can help you? Contact Tom for free advice.
