Do you expect too much from others? Find out!

Do you expect too much from others? Find out!
Do you expect too much from others Find out!

Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?

Do you expect too much from other people, or is it rather that they're neglectful? Are you too needy or clingy? Could it be that you're too keen to jump in and help, to the extent that you often get overly involved? Take the quiz below to find out!

1. I'm looking for love.

a) Not necessarily

b) Agree slightly

c) Agree strongly

2. When I'm talking to my partner or my friends, I repeatedly mention how important I feel our relationship is.

a) Disagree

b) Agree slightly

c) Agree

3. I'm hypersensitive to criticism.

a) Rarely or never

b) Sometimes

c) Always

4. Secretly, I enjoy it when other people have problems because it gives me a reason to help them.

a) Disagree

b) Agree slightly

c) Agree

5. I get satisfaction by helping other people without needing anything in return.

a) True

b) Partly true

c) False

6. I need to be reassured of other people's loyalty and love.

a) Rarely or never

b) Often

c) Always

7. I regard people I've only just met as good friends straight away.

a) Rarely or never

b) Sometimes

c) Always

8. I feel jealous when my partner spends time with their friends.

a) Disagree

b) Agree slightly

c) Agree strongly

9. I love being needed.

a) False

b) Somewhat true

c) True

10. I'm often accused of meddling in other people's affairs.

a) Rarely or never

b) Sometimes

c) Often

11. I feel other people should make me a priority in their lives.

a) False

b) Somewhat true

c) True


Now find your result: add up your scores. Give yourself one point for every a), two for every b), and three for every c).

7-15: You're emotionally self-sufficient and don't expect too much from others.

You give your love unconditionally, and you aren't afraid to help or love others without it being reciprocated. Sharing your time, attention, and assistance never feels like a burden to you: you don't use love to control other people by making them feel they owe you something. They can respond or not, as they choose. This is true in your romantic and family relationships as well as at work.

You know that relationships can change and develop and that sometimes they won't last. But you don't try to force things but just let them go. You can focus on your own needs without being self-centred; you don't depend on receiving love and attention from other people to be happy.

15- 25: You expect too much sometimes!

Most of us come into this category. While you aren't clingy or needy, you probably recognise some of the tendencies outlined in the following category. The first step towards better relationships is to acknowledge that you have some issues and work to resolve them.

25-33: You're desperate to be loved

People who expect too much from others fall into a behaviour pattern that you may not have acknowledged in yourself. If you are in this category, you probably tend to "collect" people who become more and more dependent on you. But they then feel they owe you something in return, and most people don't like feeling indebted.

You feel caring and helpful and probably spend a great deal of time doing stuff for other people and trying to solve their problems. You might think you're making a sacrifice when you share your time/money/love with them. But you aren't really giving anything away for free because you expect to get something in return. People will quickly get a sense that something isn't quite right and may start to feel trapped.

Achieve better relationships by expecting less from others

When you change your patterns of thinking and expect less from others, you'll find that your relationships are better balanced and truly fulfilling.

Concentrate on boosting your confidence and self-esteem. Bach Flower Mix 63 can help you cope with negative thoughts as well as reducing anxiety and increasing self-confidence. Stop doing so much for other people, things that they should manage for themselves: this is just over-compensation for your imagined faults. And if this triggers someone to move on, learn to let them go.

 

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-intelligent-divorce/201208/who-wants-be-needy-six-solutions

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319873




Bach flowers personal mix

Bach flowers personal mix:

  • Personal combination
  • Based on your symptoms and character
  • Bach flower remedy personally selected by Tom
  • Fast and good results
Discover how Personal Bach flowers remedy - Wizard can help you
Marie Pure

Other articles


What makes it so hard to go back to school

What makes it so hard to go back to school?

Going back to school during a pandemic is a new experience for everyone, and it's understandable if children are feeling anxious about it. We take a look at some of the issues and how you can help your child to get ready for returning to the classroom.

Read the complete article

Why it's never too late to change

Why it's never too late to change

People always think: that’s just me. I'm not good at 'X', that is just my character. Here are some reasons why it's never too late to change.

Read the complete article

12 easy ways to get people to like you

12 easy ways to get people to like you

Have you ever noticed that some people are instantly likeable? Many people believe that people will only like you because of natural traits you're born with: good looks, talent and sociability. But this is a misconception. Getting people to like you is within your control, and it's all to do with self-belief, knowing yourself and being emotionally intelligent. Here's what to do to be more likeable.

Read the complete article

fear

7 tips to help your dog with a fear of fireworks

As nice as it is for a person to celebrate New Year, it's not so nice for a dog, especially when the loud fireworks go off the whole night. This is really frightening for many dogs. Read our 7 tips on how you can help your dog with his fear of fireworks.

Read the complete article

Even the brightest minds have setbacks!

Even the brightest minds have setbacks!

We all want to be successful but many of us find the path to achieving our dreams is blocked by our fear of failure. Whether you’re trying to lose weight, go backpacking around the world or start up a new business, you need to accept that you might fail many times over before you achieve success.

Read the complete article

5 tips to survive autumn healthily

5 tips to survive autumn healthily

We simply can’t avoid noticing the changes all around us. Autumn is here... Autumn is also called a transitional season. Slowly and steadily, it prepares us for the transition...

Read the complete article

How to break your bad habits

How to break your bad habits

Bad habits waste your energy and time. They disrupt your life, risk your health and stop you from achieving your aims. So why do we do them? And what can we do to break our bad habits?

Read the complete article

Are you resilient enough Take our quiz!

Are you resilient enough? Take our quiz!

Do you have enough resilience to face the world out there? Take our quiz to find out how resilient you are and find tips on how to build your mental resilience.

Read the complete article

verleden-loslaten

Letting go of the past: 5 tips

Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.

Read the complete article

What makes it so hard to go back to work

What makes it so hard to go back to work?

Millions of people furloughed for months are now being recalled to work. Others, who have been working from home throughout the lockdown, are returning to the office. And some jobs have simply disappeared: many people are facing redundancy and will soon have to cope with job hunting. Going back to work after an unprecedented length of time at home is quite a challenge.

Read the complete article

Free personal advice for your problem?

Are you unsure which Bach flowers can help you? Contact Tom for free advice.

tom vermeersch
Tom Vermeersch

Yes, I want free advice

No thanks, I will do my own research