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Do you find yourself often thinking about your past? Do you wish you could turn back the clock to days gone by or things as they were before covid disrupted the world? Nostalgia means longing for your past, although possibly in a rose-tinted version. We reminisce about people, places, experiences and things that are past - or even for the earlier versions of ourselves.
Nostalgia originally meant homesickness, a condition when we long to be elsewhere. And unlike fantasy, nostalgia doesn't offer an alternative to reality. When we feel nostalgic, we know we are in the present. We simply feel like taking a trip down memory lane to a place where we remember things as better than they are nowadays.
In previous decades, psychologists tended to focus on nostalgia as negative. This is because it was thought to stop us from accepting what we have lost and prevent us from living in the present. But more recent research now sees that nostalgia can positively affect our mental health.
Researchers now see that nostalgia can help us feel more connected as we recall good times with our loved ones. We may also be inspired to face the challenges of the present - good things happened to us in days gone by, so if we aim to achieve our goals, good times might happen again. In addition, nostalgia can provide us with a stronger sense of identity - we are connected to the past and are someone who belongs.
In stressful times, nostalgic memories can counteract loneliness, support us to cope emotionally and cognitively, and strengthen our cultural identity and social bonds. For example, emigrants may find that sharing reminiscences of their homeland may discover that it helps them to settle in their new country.
Therapists now think there are different kinds of nostalgia, and some types are not helpful. For example, the longing when we miss things from the past that make us feel more connected and motivated to recreate these happy times is known as personal nostalgia. But sometimes, we start to miss things while they are still happening. This is known as anticipatory nostalgia and leads to worrying, sadness and anxiety.
Badly-timed nostalgia may also impact our ability to learn from our memories. For example, if you meet someone you like, but rather than being happy in the present, you start to feel anxious and sad about how you will feel when the relationship is over.
The nostalgia that is unconscious and random can also be harmful. When we consciously try to remember the past, it can elevate our mood. But when nostalgia intrudes into our thoughts at unexpected moments, it is more likely to affect us negatively.
Consider how nostalgia makes you feel. When you are constantly caught up in nostalgia and feeling sad and discouraged, it can be a sign of other problems. Ask yourself:
If nostalgia is holding you back, Bach Flower Honeysuckle helps you let go of the past, good or bad, so you don't get stuck in the "good old days".
Unhealthy, negative thought patterns can sometimes seem like nostalgia but can be signs of various mental health issues, such as:
Depression can be triggered by going over the past repeatedly, with feelings of guilt, unworthiness and self-hatred.
Rumination is when you can't stop focusing on distressing things that happened in the past and trying to work out why they happened and the possible consequences.
An addiction to romance and love can lead us to think obsessively about an ex or someone we met, so much so that it impacts our ability to cope with daily life. As a result, we may hide our feelings from our friends and family.
Anxiety is when we are always worrying about the future in a fearful way that becomes increasingly illogical. Anticipatory nostalgia can sometimes start to make you feel panicky and tense, and these feelings can develop into anxiety.
If you feel that your glorification of the past is holding you back in life, the best thing to do is to take control and choose to be more positive.
Living in the moment requires you to appreciate your surroundings, who you are with and what you are doing. Instead of being caught up in memories or being anxious about the future, savour every moment. Breaking the habit of nostalgia can seem a challenge at first, but these tips will help you to focus on being more present:
Focus on the here-and-now and leave the past behind. The past may have made you who you are today, but it doesn't define you in the future. Choosing to be less nostalgic and more optimistic about the present will allow you to succeed in achieving your goals and lead you to a happy, fulfilled life.
Sources:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/depression-management-techniques/201604/rumination-problem-in-anxiety-and-depression
https://www.wellandgood.com/stuck-in-past/
Created by Tom Vermeersch (bio)
Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.
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Do you find yourself often thinking about your past? Do you wish you could turn back the clock to days gone by or things as they were before covid disrupted the world? Nostalgia means longing for your past, although possibly in a rose-tinted version. We reminisce about people, places, experiences and things that are past - or even for the earlier versions of ourselves.
Nostalgia originally meant homesickness, a condition when we long to be elsewhere. And unlike fantasy, nostalgia doesn't offer an alternative to reality. When we feel nostalgic, we know we are in the present. We simply feel like taking a trip down memory lane to a place where we remember things as better than they are nowadays.
In previous decades, psychologists tended to focus on nostalgia as negative. This is because it was thought to stop us from accepting what we have lost and prevent us from living in the present. But more recent research now sees that nostalgia can positively affect our mental health.
Researchers now see that nostalgia can help us feel more connected as we recall good times with our loved ones. We may also be inspired to face the challenges of the present - good things happened to us in days gone by, so if we aim to achieve our goals, good times might happen again. In addition, nostalgia can provide us with a stronger sense of identity - we are connected to the past and are someone who belongs.
In stressful times, nostalgic memories can counteract loneliness, support us to cope emotionally and cognitively, and strengthen our cultural identity and social bonds. For example, emigrants may find that sharing reminiscences of their homeland may discover that it helps them to settle in their new country.
Therapists now think there are different kinds of nostalgia, and some types are not helpful. For example, the longing when we miss things from the past that make us feel more connected and motivated to recreate these happy times is known as personal nostalgia. But sometimes, we start to miss things while they are still happening. This is known as anticipatory nostalgia and leads to worrying, sadness and anxiety.
Badly-timed nostalgia may also impact our ability to learn from our memories. For example, if you meet someone you like, but rather than being happy in the present, you start to feel anxious and sad about how you will feel when the relationship is over.
The nostalgia that is unconscious and random can also be harmful. When we consciously try to remember the past, it can elevate our mood. But when nostalgia intrudes into our thoughts at unexpected moments, it is more likely to affect us negatively.
Consider how nostalgia makes you feel. When you are constantly caught up in nostalgia and feeling sad and discouraged, it can be a sign of other problems. Ask yourself:
If nostalgia is holding you back, Bach Flower Honeysuckle helps you let go of the past, good or bad, so you don't get stuck in the "good old days".
Unhealthy, negative thought patterns can sometimes seem like nostalgia but can be signs of various mental health issues, such as:
Depression can be triggered by going over the past repeatedly, with feelings of guilt, unworthiness and self-hatred.
Rumination is when you can't stop focusing on distressing things that happened in the past and trying to work out why they happened and the possible consequences.
An addiction to romance and love can lead us to think obsessively about an ex or someone we met, so much so that it impacts our ability to cope with daily life. As a result, we may hide our feelings from our friends and family.
Anxiety is when we are always worrying about the future in a fearful way that becomes increasingly illogical. Anticipatory nostalgia can sometimes start to make you feel panicky and tense, and these feelings can develop into anxiety.
If you feel that your glorification of the past is holding you back in life, the best thing to do is to take control and choose to be more positive.
Living in the moment requires you to appreciate your surroundings, who you are with and what you are doing. Instead of being caught up in memories or being anxious about the future, savour every moment. Breaking the habit of nostalgia can seem a challenge at first, but these tips will help you to focus on being more present:
Focus on the here-and-now and leave the past behind. The past may have made you who you are today, but it doesn't define you in the future. Choosing to be less nostalgic and more optimistic about the present will allow you to succeed in achieving your goals and lead you to a happy, fulfilled life.
Sources:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/depression-management-techniques/201604/rumination-problem-in-anxiety-and-depression
https://www.wellandgood.com/stuck-in-past/
Your relationship ends, or you lose your job, and you get stuck in a rut of negative thoughts and suffering. How good are you at letting go of grudges and accepting that some things are beyond your control? Take our quiz to find out!
Read the complete article
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People always think: that’s just me. I'm not good at 'X', that is just my character. Here are some reasons why it's never too late to change.
Read the complete article
Do you sometimes despair about humanity because it seems there are far more bad people than good? Are we primarily selfish individuals, thinking only about our own needs? Or is this cynical belief just because we spend so much time online? The truth is more complicated!
It's not always easy to tell if someone has depression. While some signs such as sadness, pessimism and withdrawal from social interaction are easy to recognise, other symptoms may be less obvious. And some people are very good at hiding their depression - even from themselves!
Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.
Have you ever noticed that some people are instantly likeable? Many people believe that people will only like you because of natural traits you're born with: good looks, talent and sociability. But this is a misconception. Getting people to like you is within your control, and it's all to do with self-belief, knowing yourself and being emotionally intelligent. Here's what to do to be more likeable.
People spend so much of their time regretting the past and worrying about the future. But it’s not worth it! Even what happened yesterday doesn't matter anymore! Let go of the past and the future and make the most of every moment.
It is not always obvious when someone is experiencing depression. Some people with depression mask their symptoms, hiding their feelings behind a smile to convince others they are happy.
Do you expect more from others than they are prepared to give? Signs that you may be asking too much - and how to break the pattern.
Bach Flowers are not medicinal but harmless plant extracts which are used to support health.
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