Bach Flower Advice

What to do when feeling lost in life?

Qué hacer cuando uno se siente perdido en la vida

The sense of feeling lost in your life can be a very painful experience. Regardless of whether you feel lost in a relationship, at work, or elsewhere, you can rest assured that you’re not the first person to feel this way.

Ultimately, it is possible to take something positive from what you are feeling and move forward. Use this time as a springboard for change in your life. This is a period of transformation, so use it to your advantage.


Things to bear in mind when you’re feeling lost in life

Hooray! You’re normal!

At some stage all of us will be feeling the way that you do now. Some of us will have the feeling we are ‘lost’ at key moments throughout our life. We look around at everyone else and think they have it so much better and assume everyone else knows what they are doing and where they are going. This is not the case.  We can never know what another person is going through or has gone through. Why not share your feelings with a few friends and see what sort of experiences they have had?

You are in control

It often happens that we don’t feel like we’re in control of our life. This can happen for a variety of reasons. The thing to remember however is that you are not a victim. You can choose your attitude and your reactions. How you feel is up to you. Do not be a passive bystander in your life. Make changes. Ultimately you decide on the direction you need to go in next.

Embrace the freedom that being lost offers you

If you suddenly find yourself wallowing in a miasma of despair, and you’re uncertain of what your life is about, take heart! Here’s the best chance you’ll ever be offered to create new meaning in your life and take a new direction.

Listen to your heart

Sometimes you need to take a time out of your life and discover what it is that your mind is trying to tell you. Spending time alone, perhaps on a long walk, or a journey, can really help you pin down what’s going on. You can only read the signs of your own heart’s desire if you stop to read them. If you can slow your life down enough you will hear the messages that apply to you, and you can take action on where to go from here, or not, it’s up to you.

You don’t need approval from others

Feeling lost can stem from the fact that other people don’t seem to approve of you, what you do or what you say. Forget them. You shouldn’t need the approval of others to validate yourself. The way others judge us, says more about them than it does about us. If you have lived your life based on what other people believe is right, then of course you will have lost the very essence of who you are. You cannot craft your life based on the belief and value systems that others hold, or try to foist on you.

Acknowledge who you are

You may have started out trying to be one thing, but ended up as something else. Perhaps you still hanker after a dream or an ambition from when you were younger. Don’t be down about it, it’s fabulous actually. There’s no time like the present to consider who you are and acknowledge the experiences and skills you have. Once that’s done, you can look at where to go next, and maybe you still have time to write your novel, set up a bakery or climb Everest! Life is all about change, and if you’ve come to a crossroads, you can make that change right now.

Who you are now is not who you were

We all make mistakes and we learn from them and move on. Mistakes help us to grow as human beings. Don’t label yourself - acknowledge that who you will be tomorrow can be very different from who you are today or who you were yesterday.

Get in touch with your passions

Can you remember what it is that makes your eyes light up and your heart burst with happiness? It may be a long time since you were in touch with your passions, but perhaps it’s time you did. Stop making excuses about the time not being right because the time will never be right unless you make it so. The time is now, so get on with it!

Do something that makes you feel challenged

If life has become stuck in a rut, there is no time like the present to do something completely new. Think up some new ambitions and go for it. You may be 50 years’ old and in a secure job, but if you’ve always wanted to backpack around Asia, what’s to stop you doing that? OK, perhaps an extended trip is out of the question, but you could still have a weekend away somewhere you’ve never been before and explore a new town. In order to create new meaning and direction in life, it is sometimes necessary to take risks.

Ask for help if you need it

Sometimes this feeling is too big for one person. If you would benefit from talking to someone else about how lost you feel, do reach out for help. You could speak to your doctor, a life coach, a counsellor or a friend. Be open to suggestions and guidance and take your time to find what is right for you. It will be worth the effort!

Created by Tom Vermeersch ()

Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.

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What to do when feeling lost in life?

What to do when feeling lost in life?
Qué hacer cuando uno se siente perdido en la vida

The sense of feeling lost in your life can be a very painful experience. Regardless of whether you feel lost in a relationship, at work, or elsewhere, you can rest assured that you’re not the first person to feel this way.

Ultimately, it is possible to take something positive from what you are feeling and move forward. Use this time as a springboard for change in your life. This is a period of transformation, so use it to your advantage.


Things to bear in mind when you’re feeling lost in life

Hooray! You’re normal!

At some stage all of us will be feeling the way that you do now. Some of us will have the feeling we are ‘lost’ at key moments throughout our life. We look around at everyone else and think they have it so much better and assume everyone else knows what they are doing and where they are going. This is not the case.  We can never know what another person is going through or has gone through. Why not share your feelings with a few friends and see what sort of experiences they have had?

You are in control

It often happens that we don’t feel like we’re in control of our life. This can happen for a variety of reasons. The thing to remember however is that you are not a victim. You can choose your attitude and your reactions. How you feel is up to you. Do not be a passive bystander in your life. Make changes. Ultimately you decide on the direction you need to go in next.

Embrace the freedom that being lost offers you

If you suddenly find yourself wallowing in a miasma of despair, and you’re uncertain of what your life is about, take heart! Here’s the best chance you’ll ever be offered to create new meaning in your life and take a new direction.

Listen to your heart

Sometimes you need to take a time out of your life and discover what it is that your mind is trying to tell you. Spending time alone, perhaps on a long walk, or a journey, can really help you pin down what’s going on. You can only read the signs of your own heart’s desire if you stop to read them. If you can slow your life down enough you will hear the messages that apply to you, and you can take action on where to go from here, or not, it’s up to you.

You don’t need approval from others

Feeling lost can stem from the fact that other people don’t seem to approve of you, what you do or what you say. Forget them. You shouldn’t need the approval of others to validate yourself. The way others judge us, says more about them than it does about us. If you have lived your life based on what other people believe is right, then of course you will have lost the very essence of who you are. You cannot craft your life based on the belief and value systems that others hold, or try to foist on you.

Acknowledge who you are

You may have started out trying to be one thing, but ended up as something else. Perhaps you still hanker after a dream or an ambition from when you were younger. Don’t be down about it, it’s fabulous actually. There’s no time like the present to consider who you are and acknowledge the experiences and skills you have. Once that’s done, you can look at where to go next, and maybe you still have time to write your novel, set up a bakery or climb Everest! Life is all about change, and if you’ve come to a crossroads, you can make that change right now.

Who you are now is not who you were

We all make mistakes and we learn from them and move on. Mistakes help us to grow as human beings. Don’t label yourself - acknowledge that who you will be tomorrow can be very different from who you are today or who you were yesterday.

Get in touch with your passions

Can you remember what it is that makes your eyes light up and your heart burst with happiness? It may be a long time since you were in touch with your passions, but perhaps it’s time you did. Stop making excuses about the time not being right because the time will never be right unless you make it so. The time is now, so get on with it!

Do something that makes you feel challenged

If life has become stuck in a rut, there is no time like the present to do something completely new. Think up some new ambitions and go for it. You may be 50 years’ old and in a secure job, but if you’ve always wanted to backpack around Asia, what’s to stop you doing that? OK, perhaps an extended trip is out of the question, but you could still have a weekend away somewhere you’ve never been before and explore a new town. In order to create new meaning and direction in life, it is sometimes necessary to take risks.

Ask for help if you need it

Sometimes this feeling is too big for one person. If you would benefit from talking to someone else about how lost you feel, do reach out for help. You could speak to your doctor, a life coach, a counsellor or a friend. Be open to suggestions and guidance and take your time to find what is right for you. It will be worth the effort!


Marie Pure

Other articles


What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school?

What can you do if your kid doesn't want to go back to school? Here are our hints and tips to help if your child is expressing a refusal to go to school.

Read the complete article

Feeling blue

Feeling blue?

Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.

Read the complete article

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk

Is your sex life putting your relationship at risk?

Sexual desire is a complex interaction of hormones, emotions and well-being. When your partner is not as interested in sex as you are, it’s rarely a rejection of you as a person. So it’s essential to be as empathetic as you can regarding your differing libidos.

Read the complete article

Is loneliness a disease?

Is loneliness a disease?

Is loneliness a disease? Loneliness has been recognised as a precursor and cause of poor physical and mental health and has even been described as a ‘hidden killer’ especially among older people. Loneliness is a complex human emotion, unique for every person. Do you recognise this issue? Read on.

Read the complete article

Are you stuck in a rut

Are you stuck in a rut?

Sometimes it’s hard to notice when we've become trapped in familiar routines. Take our quiz to find out if you’re stuck in a rut and what you can do about it.

Read the complete article

Top 10 age-reversing habits

Top 10 age-reversing habits

From colouring your hair to whitening your teeth, there's a wide array of cosmetic options to make you look more youthful. But there's also a range of solutions that have been shown to slow or even reverse the ageing process.

Read the complete article

Simple tips to not be afraid of the future

Simple tips to not be afraid of the future

No one knows what the future holds, so don't waste time and energy worrying about it. Read our tips and find out how to stop being afraid of what might never happen.

Read the complete article

Do We Label Too Fast

Do We Label Too Fast?

Nowadays, it can sometimes seem almost everyone has a mental health issue or learning disorder. But, are we too quick to label people, or is it that we are more aware of the problems? This article looks at some of the issues surrounding these sensitive questions.

Read the complete article

Find out if you’re (secretly) a perfectionist

Find out if you’re (secretly) a perfectionist

Can setting high standards for yourself ever be a problem? For most people, striving for perfection would be considered a positive thing. For example, musicians only reach concert standard after thousands of hours of practice and athletes can't reach peak performance without long hours of training.

Read the complete article

Do you expect too much from others

Do you expect too much from others?

Do you expect more from others than they are prepared to give? Signs that you may be asking too much - and how to break the pattern.

Read the complete article

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