Do you feel you're always doing the same things and not getting anywhere? It's common to feel stuck in a rut, treading water and just going through the motions.
The feeling can build up gradually, and you feel like you're just killing time rather than working towards a goal. You might not even notice at first that you're stagnating - here are some signs that you might be getting stuck in a rut:
If you recognise these signs, the first step is to work out what's causing your dissatisfaction. Not every rut is the same - you may be in a rut with your job or feeling bored in a relationship. Friendships, hobbies, your home and your health, can all cause you to feel dissatisfied.
Once you have understood the cause of your feelings, don't blame or criticise yourself. It can be all too easy to minimise the problem and trivialise your emotions. You have a right to feel the way you do - while things may seem OK to others, if you want more from life, it's time to make some changes!
Self-compassion is the key to mental well-being, so start by looking after yourself.
Are you getting enough sleep? Are you eating well and exercising? Do you spend time with people who can support you?
If something is missing, look for ways to care for yourself better. Looking after your well-being will give you the energy to move forward and feel excited about life again.
We're creatures of habit, and sometimes feeling stuck in a rut arises out of boredom. So try to change things up a bit - they don't have to be massive changes, just a few small steps to get you started. Here are a few ideas to add zest to your life:
Watch a new show, sign up for a class or walk a different way to work.
You will learn something new about those around you, and chatting with different people will expand your social circle.
Schedule some time to have fun doing something you love - a hobby, a sport or spending time with friends.
Be spontaneous, and don't be afraid of doing unexpected things.
Research has shown that spending time outside increases mental well-being. For example, walking can lower stress and break the pattern of ruminating on negative thoughts that can trigger depression. In addition, it's an excellent way to build regular exercise into your daily routine.
Studies also show that being outside in nature also boosts creativity. So the next time you feel stuck, go outdoors and pay attention to the world. Let go of negativity, relax and enjoy the beauty around you. You will return to your desk with renewed energy.
It's easy to feel life is unfulfilling when you're not looking forward to anything. Having a sense of purpose is a crucial ingredient for motivation. For example, long-term goals related to your relationships or job can give you a sense of purpose. And it doesn't have to be anything major - even planning a get-together at the weekend gives you something to look forward to and boosts your mood.
And research shows that having something to aim for builds self-control and willpower. Better resilience helps you to cope with stresses and challenges in everyday life while you look forward to future rewards.
Here are some ideas for giving yourself things you can look forward to:
You can look forward to existing events, such as Christmas or a football match. But you can also intentionally make plans for yourself. For example, schedule a day out with friends or a holiday to a new place. Create things you can anticipate and be excited about.
Small weekly or daily rewards, such as going to your favourite cafe at lunchtime or buying yourself some flowers, are great ways to build a sense of looking forward to the future.
Helping others is an excellent way to gain a sense of purpose and meaning in life. Focus on helping a loved one with a project, participate in political activism or volunteer with a local organisation to contribute to the community.
Whether you're dissatisfied with your job, your relationships, or the place you live, only you can take action to make things more exciting and lose that feeling of being stuck in a rut.
You probably already know why you feel unfulfilled and want more out of life. So start to make small changes, chipping away at whatever holds you back. Don't feel guilty; you have a right to get the most out of life. But only you can take action to fulfil your potential, regain your optimism and get your life fizzing again.
Sources:
https://www.royalcornwall.nhs.uk/services/pain/pain-management-service/how-can-i-start-to-prioritise-my-self-care/
https://www.psychalive.org/i-hate-my-life/
Most people are disappointed when others don't meet their expectations. But when you always expect too much, it isn't healthy, either for yourself or for others. If you often find yourself feeling let down by your loved ones or even by strangers, could it be that you have unrealistic ideas of how people should act?
Read the complete articleWhile you often hear people joking that they have OCD because they like to keep their house clean and tidy, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder can be a distressing and debilitating mental health condition with a wide range of symptoms.
People spend so much of their time regretting the past and worrying about the future. But it’s not worth it! Even what happened yesterday doesn't matter anymore! Let go of the past and the future and make the most of every moment.
Lynn Anderson told it very nicely in her song “I beg your pardon; I never promised you a rose garden”. Life isn’t all roses and everybody experiences something they would rather not once in their life.
Read the complete articleIt's natural to compare our own lives with those of others - weighing up the pros and cons of situations helps us make decisions. But there can be a downside when you find you're constantly comparing yourself with others, envying their seemingly perfect lives and wondering why they are luckier, more prosperous, and better looking than you.
Legends of immortality have been told and retold throughout history. From ancient Greek myths to modern movies and novels, the dream of eternal youth has been passed down from generation to generation.
Read the complete articleDo you sometimes feel your achievements are not the result of your hard work and skill but are just luck? And do you fear that one day, someone will reveal you as an imposter or fraud? You might have imposter syndrome!
Motivation can be somewhat elusive - some days, you just can't seem to make yourself do the stuff you don't want to. But putting things off just leads to stress, frustration and a sense of guilt.
Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.
Narcissism is a term we often see these days. But what does it mean? It's used to describe a person who is full of themselves or overly vain. However, it's not really about self-love.
Are you unsure which Bach flowers can help you? Contact Tom for free advice.