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Low self-image: 10 tips against an inferiority complex

Low self-image 10 tips against an  inferiority complex

A person who suffers with an inferiority complex can be defined as someone who tends to fixate on their own perceived weaknesses and flaws, while comparing themselves negatively to other people. Of course, we all have flaws but those who have an inferiority complex can see very little about themselves in a positive light. Psychological studies have found that people who think this way about themselves struggle to find lasting happiness.

The opposite of an inferiority complex would be a superiority complex, where a person thinks they are better than everyone else, and can of course be completely deluded. It is far healthier to walk the middle ground between an inferiority and a superiority complex.

Where does an inferiority complex come from?

Psychologists think that the root causes of an inferiority complex can originate in childhood.

  • Your parents may never have shown they were pleased or proud of you
  • You may have faced harsh criticism at school ended

How does an inferiority complex manifest itself?

You may recognise the most common symptoms if you’re an inferiority complex sufferer. These can include:

  • Feeling worthless.
  • You have trouble standing up for yourself.
  • Feeling you fall short in comparison to other people.
  • Failing to see how other people have their own flaws and foibles, and can be just as fallible as you. You only see the best things about others and not about yourself.
  • Overly sensitivity to criticism. Even when you receive constructive criticism you will feel attacked and defensive, and this will inevitably lead to feelings of self-loathing or shame. Any slight sign of rejection or exclusion can make you feel down.
  • You imagine you are being judged negatively by others, and that no-one thinks your contributions are valuable.
  • On social media platforms you may feel jealous and sad when you see what others are up to.
  • Perfectionism. You think that if something isn’t perfect, it must be a failure.

10 tips to guard against an inferiority complex

1. Who cares? You do!

Your knee jerk reaction may be to try not to give a monkey’s about what anyone else thinks. But what you should actually do is the reverse. Start caring only about what YOU think. Judge yourself by your own standards. If you did your best, then you did a great job! This means understanding what you personally (and realistically) find to be valuable, and then measuring yourself against your own standards.

2. Stop comparing yourself

We live in a world where on the one hand we are inundated by images of perfection and glamour through the media and its ridiculous obsession with celebrity, while on the other, social media means we are constantly comparing ourselves and our lives to other people. This is a pointless exercise. When you look at someone else’s profile or photo and feel worthless or jealous, take a moment to think realistically what you know about that person and their lives. You cannot compare your whole life to one thing you see or know about somebody else.

You are you, not somebody else, and the you that you are, is unique.

3. Build up your own confidence

When you feel better about yourself, you have an increased sense of security and you feel worthy (instead of inferior). Try and treat yourself better, by reminding yourself that you are valuable and by taking good care of yourself (what you eat and drink, what exercise you do, what you read, how you dress, how you groom yourself etc.). Start now by making a list of what you love about yourself and pinning its somewhere you can see it.

4. Talk to yourself nicely

Do you let your inner critic run the show? Now is the time to tell it to shut up! Think about the words you use to talk about yourself. Is it negative? Are there elements of self-loathing? Do you see how unkind you are being to yourself? Turn that inner critic around. Talk to yourself about how worthy you are instead. Believe it!

5. Surround yourself with positive happy people

It may be the case that the people you hang around with most are the ones who are quite critical of you. If you do have toxic friends, or members of your family are downright mean, eliminate them from your life as far as possible. Or put them straight. No-one needs to put you down. You’ll develop a much healthier sense of self if you hang around with the people who value you and what you do.

6. Practise body confidence

Try and use positive body language even if you feel shy. Where possible, look at someone directly, smile, talk at a normal volume, have the confidence to listen and think before you respond to a question.

7. Forget perfectionism

If you’re a perfectionist, nothing will ever be good enough, and you’ll feel bad because inferiority and perfectionism tend to go together, united in comparison and judgement. Perfectionism tends to lend itself to procrastination and inaction, meaning you’ll never achieve what you want to achieve, and this starts a vicious cycle of judging yourself and feeling negative about your achievements. You can only get better at things, by failing and learning lessons first.

8. Social media is a veneer

Recognise that social media is a superficial way to present our lives. We choose what we want others to see. We don’t show pictures of our boils, or our kids’ head lice, or the wet towels all over the untidy bathroom. Research from Glasgow University suggests night-time usage of social media is associated with poor sleep, lower self-esteem and increased anxiety and depression. Social media distorts what we see - so either don’t use it, or take everything you see with a pinch of salt.

9. Be brave!

What is your definition of failure, and why do you define failure a certain way? Is it because of other people’s expectations? If that’s the case. You may be living your life according to what other people want and expect. Potentially this can damage your happiness. Being brave and living the life you want is one way to rid yourself of an inferiority complex. You are a unique individual, and if you choose to live in a cave and Rescue hedgehogs, why shouldn’t you? Cast aside societal norms if you want to, and live the way you want, as long as you’re not hurting anyone else, no-one has a right to judge.

10. One final thought

One of my favourite quotes is this one, from Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Your inferiority complex starts with you, but you have the most amazing and ultimate of powers – you can change yourself.

Created by Tom Vermeersch ()

Tom Vermeersch

Tom Vermeersch is a certified Psychologist and Bach flower expert with more than 30 years of experience.

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Low self-image: 10 tips against an inferiority complex

Low self-image: 10 tips against an inferiority complex
Low self-image 10 tips against an  inferiority complex

A person who suffers with an inferiority complex can be defined as someone who tends to fixate on their own perceived weaknesses and flaws, while comparing themselves negatively to other people. Of course, we all have flaws but those who have an inferiority complex can see very little about themselves in a positive light. Psychological studies have found that people who think this way about themselves struggle to find lasting happiness.

The opposite of an inferiority complex would be a superiority complex, where a person thinks they are better than everyone else, and can of course be completely deluded. It is far healthier to walk the middle ground between an inferiority and a superiority complex.

Where does an inferiority complex come from?

Psychologists think that the root causes of an inferiority complex can originate in childhood.

  • Your parents may never have shown they were pleased or proud of you
  • You may have faced harsh criticism at school ended

How does an inferiority complex manifest itself?

You may recognise the most common symptoms if you’re an inferiority complex sufferer. These can include:

  • Feeling worthless.
  • You have trouble standing up for yourself.
  • Feeling you fall short in comparison to other people.
  • Failing to see how other people have their own flaws and foibles, and can be just as fallible as you. You only see the best things about others and not about yourself.
  • Overly sensitivity to criticism. Even when you receive constructive criticism you will feel attacked and defensive, and this will inevitably lead to feelings of self-loathing or shame. Any slight sign of rejection or exclusion can make you feel down.
  • You imagine you are being judged negatively by others, and that no-one thinks your contributions are valuable.
  • On social media platforms you may feel jealous and sad when you see what others are up to.
  • Perfectionism. You think that if something isn’t perfect, it must be a failure.

10 tips to guard against an inferiority complex

1. Who cares? You do!

Your knee jerk reaction may be to try not to give a monkey’s about what anyone else thinks. But what you should actually do is the reverse. Start caring only about what YOU think. Judge yourself by your own standards. If you did your best, then you did a great job! This means understanding what you personally (and realistically) find to be valuable, and then measuring yourself against your own standards.

2. Stop comparing yourself

We live in a world where on the one hand we are inundated by images of perfection and glamour through the media and its ridiculous obsession with celebrity, while on the other, social media means we are constantly comparing ourselves and our lives to other people. This is a pointless exercise. When you look at someone else’s profile or photo and feel worthless or jealous, take a moment to think realistically what you know about that person and their lives. You cannot compare your whole life to one thing you see or know about somebody else.

You are you, not somebody else, and the you that you are, is unique.

3. Build up your own confidence

When you feel better about yourself, you have an increased sense of security and you feel worthy (instead of inferior). Try and treat yourself better, by reminding yourself that you are valuable and by taking good care of yourself (what you eat and drink, what exercise you do, what you read, how you dress, how you groom yourself etc.). Start now by making a list of what you love about yourself and pinning its somewhere you can see it.

4. Talk to yourself nicely

Do you let your inner critic run the show? Now is the time to tell it to shut up! Think about the words you use to talk about yourself. Is it negative? Are there elements of self-loathing? Do you see how unkind you are being to yourself? Turn that inner critic around. Talk to yourself about how worthy you are instead. Believe it!

5. Surround yourself with positive happy people

It may be the case that the people you hang around with most are the ones who are quite critical of you. If you do have toxic friends, or members of your family are downright mean, eliminate them from your life as far as possible. Or put them straight. No-one needs to put you down. You’ll develop a much healthier sense of self if you hang around with the people who value you and what you do.

6. Practise body confidence

Try and use positive body language even if you feel shy. Where possible, look at someone directly, smile, talk at a normal volume, have the confidence to listen and think before you respond to a question.

7. Forget perfectionism

If you’re a perfectionist, nothing will ever be good enough, and you’ll feel bad because inferiority and perfectionism tend to go together, united in comparison and judgement. Perfectionism tends to lend itself to procrastination and inaction, meaning you’ll never achieve what you want to achieve, and this starts a vicious cycle of judging yourself and feeling negative about your achievements. You can only get better at things, by failing and learning lessons first.

8. Social media is a veneer

Recognise that social media is a superficial way to present our lives. We choose what we want others to see. We don’t show pictures of our boils, or our kids’ head lice, or the wet towels all over the untidy bathroom. Research from Glasgow University suggests night-time usage of social media is associated with poor sleep, lower self-esteem and increased anxiety and depression. Social media distorts what we see - so either don’t use it, or take everything you see with a pinch of salt.

9. Be brave!

What is your definition of failure, and why do you define failure a certain way? Is it because of other people’s expectations? If that’s the case. You may be living your life according to what other people want and expect. Potentially this can damage your happiness. Being brave and living the life you want is one way to rid yourself of an inferiority complex. You are a unique individual, and if you choose to live in a cave and Rescue hedgehogs, why shouldn’t you? Cast aside societal norms if you want to, and live the way you want, as long as you’re not hurting anyone else, no-one has a right to judge.

10. One final thought

One of my favourite quotes is this one, from Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Your inferiority complex starts with you, but you have the most amazing and ultimate of powers – you can change yourself.




Bach flowers mix 44: Performance anxiety

Bach flowers mix 44 helps to:

  • Have more self-confidence
  • Remove performance anxiety
  • Prevent panicking
  • Believe in yourself more
  • Be more calm and peaceful
Discover how Bach flowers mix 44 can help you
Marie Pure

Other articles


What makes it so hard to go back to school

What makes it so hard to go back to school?

Going back to school during a pandemic is a new experience for everyone, and it's understandable if children are feeling anxious about it. We take a look at some of the issues and how you can help your child to get ready for returning to the classroom.

Read the complete article

Are you stuck in a rut

Are you stuck in a rut?

Sometimes it’s hard to notice when we've become trapped in familiar routines. Take our quiz to find out if you’re stuck in a rut and what you can do about it.

Read the complete article

I don't want to!

I don't want to!

Motivation can be somewhat elusive - some days, you just can't seem to make yourself do the stuff you don't want to. But putting things off just leads to stress, frustration and a sense of guilt.

Read the complete article

Subtle signs your child is unhappy

Subtle signs your child is unhappy

According to figures from the World Health Organisation, more than 260 million people worldwide suffer from depression. And it's not only adults who are diagnosed with this illness. Children as young as three or four years old can experience depression.

Read the complete article

7 Reasons Why Your Child is Underperforming

7 Reasons Why Your Child is Underperforming

As parents, we often worry about a poor school report as much, if not more, as our kids do! And if your child's grades are slipping, you'll be looking for reasons and if there's anything you can do to help.

Read the complete article

Did you get stuck in the past

Did you get stuck in the past?

Do you find yourself often thinking about your past? Do you wish you could turn back the clock to days gone by or things as they were before covid disrupted the world?

Read the complete article

Stop worrying and live in the moment

Stop worrying and live in the moment

People spend so much of their time regretting the past and worrying about the future. But it’s not worth it! Even what happened yesterday doesn't matter anymore! Let go of the past and the future and make the most of every moment.

Read the complete article

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Feeling blue?

Feeling blue? You're not alone! We all feel sad at times; it's a normal human emotion. Sometimes, it's clear to see what has triggered our depression. Common reasons for feeling sad include bereavement, the end of a relationship, losing your job or money problems. But it's not always so clearcut.

Read the complete article

Why you're not the best

Why you're not the best

What are your aims in life? Do you plan to be rich, to be a top footballer, to be a good parent, or to become Prime Minister? However efficiently you plan your life, sooner or later you are going to come up against obstacles to achieving your goals.

Read the complete article

have you considered yoga

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Have you considered yoga? There are many advantages to practicing yoga. It is a holistic practice benefitting you physically, emotionally & mentally.

Read the complete article

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