I experience everything completely differently

Hi Tom,

We are now a bit further along and I wanted to share how things are going. The first bottle is almost empty now.

I wanted to thank you sincerely for the mix you made for me.

The first thing I noticed was that my physical complaints decreased. I had so much pain in my joints, was so exhausted and was completely immobile because of that exhaustion. I am still tired, but the difference is huge. I am no longer stuck in a rut. I am much more aware of my fatigue, and accept it when it's there. I don't longer see it as my enemy which means I am no longer helplessly stuck and this attitude lessens its' intensity.

The Bach flowers trigger so much in me. Sometimes very confrontational, but gentle. Sometimes frightening, but also hopeful. Where I used to become abruptly overcome with fear and panic, and just wait out the moment, feeling powerless, now I experience everything completely differently.

It is still there. The sudden fear and panic. But for the first time I experience these moments with strength. A beautiful strength. From that strength I dare to face my fears for the first time. I dare to embrace them more as something that belongs to me, that doesn't have to be necessarily bad. I embrace them and trust that they are trying to make something clear to me.

By daring to look at the challenges and daring to embrace them, I have so many new insights. Confrontational and overwhelming, and always intense. But the colour of that intensity is so much softer, more positive. And that is a big difference in experiencing it. At that moments I experience the hidden presence of strength. That strength gives me trust and ease. Trust means no longer fighting it helplessly, no longer trying to get away from it with all my energy. I embrace it and try to listen to what my fear is trying to say to me.

I started looking at myself for the first time in a very long time, with much sensitivity and care. It feels like the haze that was around me wants to disappear. I am curious about my further progress.

In the meantime I am staying a little longer at home. I see now and accept that this is what I need (I was over my limits for far too long). Home seems like a soft base to gain some new perspectives before I 'rejoin the world'. I can take the time I need. I allow myself to take the time. And that is good. Because this whole process is hard work :). And still it has slowly given me back my energy. A beautiful energy.

So I am very grateful to you. Looking back I didn't gave you that much information because I was not sure about myself at all, I wasn't in touch with myself. But your mix does such nice things here inside me.

Kind regards and have a nice weekend